Kim Priore

I’ve been thinking a lot lately about memory – for several reasons, really.  One, it came up in one of my classes, in reading memoirs, slave narratives specifically.  One author I read remarked that sometimes, especially in slave memoirs, the silences speak louder than the words.  What is it, this author asked, that we choose to remember, and what is it we will ourselves to forget?

Another reason is that in looking ahead to that big empty vortex after June that I keep talking about, in thinking about what I want to do with my life, and what others choose to do with theirs, sometimes I think all really of us really want is to be remembered.  To do something that will make a mark on the world, so that someone will remember us after we’re gone.

A third reason – and here’s where I go all selfish and self-pitying (don’t say I didn’t warn you) – is that a couple of times recently I have reached out to old friends.  None of whom read this blog, so no, it’s not you.  But you know, left random voicemails saying, hey I haven’t talked to you in awhile and really miss you, or in another case responded to a round of correspondence I didn’t start, saying hey yes I’d love to get together.  And maybe I’m just a loser, but when I hear from someone I haven’t talked to in a long time, I consider that kind of nice.  You know, to be remembered.  Someone, somewhere out there, had me on the brain today.  So I try to return those types of phone calls when I get them.  And I guess it’s inevitable that in the busy-ness of life that sometimes phone calls and e-mails like that go unanswered.  But it just kind of makes you wonder, what does it take to be remembered?  How long do you go on trying to make yourself unforgettable, before you have to learn to let go of one-sided relationships? 

On a happier note, and here’s where I talk myself OUT of self-pitying mode (see? that was quick) – I am also thinking about memory because this weekend (drumroll please) is the long anticipated, often imitated never duplicated, Newsies Turn 30 San Francisco Extravaganza ™!!!  On the agenda so far: a viewing of the cinematic tour de force that is Spice World, extensive analysis of any and all Victoria Beckham related news, hot tub, kareoke, and possibly Hooters.  The point is this, though.  (Yes, I said Hooters, get over it) – memories are great because they are the glue that holds our friendships together.  Also, beer helps.  (That was for you, Spiff)  But it’s great to have a group of friends who have known you for so long, say, since the original ‘what the hell am i going to do with my life’ crisis – and can be your constant sources of insight and laughter for the journey – who you know remember you, and who are excited to make new memories.

So that’s it for the deep thoughts, and look forward to a post-SF update next week.